Favourite Friday: Why I hope I would still have my kids

So when I say to people, "I think three is enough," they look at me as if I'm mad. I have three beautiful children and yes, two of them happen to be autistic. I was sparked into considering the possibility of their non-existence by a recent approval for a Down's Syndrome test. Read more... 

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Cookie Tots - Lovely little hedgehog is a hit

Sometimes I worry that my boys will never be able to do simple daily tasks like brushing their teeth, tie their shoes or cook a meal for themselves.  Cooking is a great way for all kids to learn and involves valuable skills for any child like measuring, sharing... and waiting.  Some of these can be difficult for kids with autism because they involve motor skills, sensory feedback and seeing things from other people's perspective like in Theory of Mind.  So I figured it was about time I think about these issues and what might work for them when doing recipes.

We've been visiting Cookie Tots, a kids cooking club, with Jane who is two and half years old.  At the club they sing and do actions to songs that teach them about cooking, hygiene and different ingredients. This can be engaging for some kids with autism who may also appreciate the structured the sessions.  

For anyone who likes their senses stimulated, there is hands on fun squashing, squeezing and learning how to cut, mix, tear and enjoy food. If your child is at the stage where they are following instructions then they may like that you get a recipe to take home with you and a special stamp too!  We make the recipe at the club and then take it home to cook. If your kids have difficulty waiting during the session you could try giving them a 'wait' token/card to hold and at home use this or an egg timer to watch while the food is cooking in the oven.

Recently we made: Seeded Tomato Bread Hedgehogs

Jane loved making this bread hedgehog. There was no kneading necessary but a bit of shaping of the dough.  If that's too sticky for your kids then you can help with this bit or use lots of flour to stop it being sticky.  Alternatively if they love getting their hands in a mess then make lots.  Adding the pumpkin seeds on top was challenging and a great fine motor skill and counting task. 

Some kids with autism avoid gluten.  If your kids are avoiding gluten you could try switching for a gluten free flour like rice flour but add in some (gluten free) baking powder to make sure your hedgehog doesn't go flat!  Picky eater Anthony enjoyed eating it.  He likes breads, pasta and pizza for comparison to your kiddies likes.

Links
Our Blog - Theory of Mind, double rainbow and breakfast
Our Blog - Getting responses using a token economy, following instructions

External
NAS - Sensory

Getting responses using a token economy

David is in a specialist ASD unit attached to a mainstream school.  He's making progress, it's brilliant.  One of the key difficulties David faced with education is his self direction. David was interested in doing what David wanted to do and this not only made it difficult to teach him but even harder to evaluate what he knew and could do to start with.

This post has been updated - see it here.  See some related links below. 

Links
Our blog - Why sharing gingerbread men is truly amazing

External links
The Autism Helper - The token economy, dos and don'ts

SEN: Accessing specialist units or special schools

You already know your child will need extra support at school. The question is what type and where it is best for them to have it?  The preference is always for your child to go to a regular mainstream school if this setting can meet their needs, but that's not always possible. We knew after our experience with Anthony, our first child with ASD, who went to a mainstream school that there was no way that David, our second, could cope with it. We knew David would need a specialist unit, so what did I learn about getting him into one?

Never taught how to break the ice, in a different key

Is it possible that people with autism are still locked away?  I simply couldn't imagine being parted from my children or them being hidden from society because they happen to be autistic.  This is undoubtedly what used to happen as reported in The Daily Telegraph this Saturday by Kate Chisholm whilst reviewing 'In a Different Key' by John Donvan and Caren Zucker. 

As I read the review I was, as I have been many times, so relieved to be living in a time and country where my children are not taken to state-run institutions where they will be pumped full of various narcotics in an attempt to 'normalise' or placate their behaviour.

One of the keys parts of the review focused on the blame put on mothers for their children being autistic. According to the review, an article in Times Magazine in April 1948 ran an article that suggested these (my) 'frosted children' became so because their 'refrigerator  mothers' failed to bond with them.  I suspect it is simply that the mothers were never given the tools to break through the ice.

I remember having a feeling of disappointment after my first son had his first speech and language therapy session.  They hadn't done or said anything?  In fact all the therapist seemed to do was show me specific ways of playing with my darling boy.  As if I didn't spend all day sometimes trying to play with him.  She had pointed out a few things she was doing and gave notes to me on them afterwards.

Of course I realised that I was being given strategies to do therapy at home.  It was simple things like encouraging gap filling, encouraging requesting, encouraging eye contact and all just by changing the way I spoke and moved. Our second child needed more assistance in the form of my learning Makaton sign language and him using a picture exchange system to communicate. In both occasions, I was given the strategies and equipment to help my 'frosted children', indeed, I as given the tools to break the ice and help them access the world around them.

I'm so thankful that attitudes and 'healthcare' described were not frozen in time.  Speech and language therapy along with many other types of therapy such as occupational therapy is not simply dispensed at an institution or health centre.  Certainly for us, it's a way of expanding my sons horizons and is delivered on a daily basis with a mother's love and compassion.  And when there is a breakthrough, the results simply melt my heart.

Links
Our Blog - Why ALL forms of communication are awesome, it's not all about talking
Our Blog - Comments from Steve Silberman on Neurotribes

External
The Telegraph - In a Different Key

Cheery after chess, autism and games

Clubs are a bit hit and miss at school. We've found that after school ones seem to be a bit too much for Anthony. As a boy with ASD, ADHD and hypermobility, the sports ones require too much information processing and a lot of the clubs are sports related. Anthony was until Christmas only enrolled in a lunchtime computer club. 

Last term, all the Year 3 classes started playing chess on a Wednesday afternoon. At first I was a unsure how Anthony would react to chess.  It can seem a bit complicated and requires a lot of focus. However it turned out that rules and systems worked well for him. He totally got chess.  Most of the time he played with his teaching assistants but he started to request it at reward time. So, when the club renewal came round, I enrolled him in the Chess Club. 

He seemed keen and he received a chess set as a present for Christmas. We've had a few games but mostly they have been lessons really as we help Anthony realise what will happen next on the board. He's quite keen on using his queen a lot. He says it's because it's such a strong piece. But then he often looses her early in the game. A few times at home this has ended in tears and I wondered whether Chess Club was going to be a disaster. Mostly I was keen to ensure that he had lost a few times with me so I could see his reaction.  This way I could help him cope with loosing.  

When the day came. Anthony's teaching assistant took him to the club at lunchtime and left after a few minutes. When I collected him from school, she grabbed me before Anthony came to the door to tell me that he'd lost both his games.

My heart sank and I was prepared for the worst, but I needn't have been. He was almost pleased about it. "I'm getting lots of experience of chess and I'm seeing what others do to win." he said. 

My son may not be the king of the Chess Club but he's no pawn either.

Links
Our Blog - Mummification mishaps - autism and dressing up at school

As listed in:

SEN: Choosing a mainstream school

When your child has special educational needs (SEN) it feels like there is an even greater weight to getting the right school for them. Many children with SEN can attend regular mainstream schools and have their needs met well there. Both our boys have an ASD diagnosis but only one is in a mainstream school.  Our eldest son positively blossoms in this setting. So what can I share about getting him a mainstream school?

Why I hope I would still have my kids

So when I say to people, "I think three is enough," they look at me as if I'm mad. I have three beautiful children and yes, two of them happen to be autistic. I was sparked into considering the possibility of their non-existence by a recent approval for a Down's Syndrome test.

It's moony tonight

Our Anthony often says or sees things others either don't notice, or don't think about like he does.  He makes great observations on the way home.  His latest one made me smile. He looked up at the evening sky and declared "The moon is very bright, yes, it's very moony."
Read more here