How to help our autistic kids sleep in this heat

The heat is on.. and so are the warm nights.  Small chat about the weather this week has consisted of the various ways people have been staying cool whilst trying to sleep.  Windows have been opened and fans have been on in an effort to shift some of the slightly cooler air through the homes in our part of London. But not in our house - it's just not safe with our kids.  So what's our latest tips to help survive the warm nights?

A New Year as a parent of autistic teens

Both my boys are now teenagers.  Despite David being really small for his age, which we've often suspected is due to his restricted diet, he's now as tall as me.  Anthony is much taller and with a current special interest in health and fitness, he's also a lot stronger.  He can do 100 pull-ups without much difficulty... I can't do one ha ha!

In fact, I often feel like I'm last person to be considered in anything. I couldn't think of anything I'd want as an actual physical gift for Christmas, I struggle to think about what hobby I'd like to do (like I have the time for that). But I think possibly I have to recognise there is more to me and that things move on.

Why my autistic son hits only me

I'm stood at the kitchen counter, peanut buttering the nth bit of toast when David runs through from the living room at high speed.  I see him coming and try to put my hand out to lower his fist, but I'm too late. Sock, it smacks me in the back not that far from my kidneys.   I put my hand on my back, then bend my knees so I come down nearer to David's level, then say, "David, need help?"

Helping our autistic son with exam stress

A recent report into anxiety and depression in people under the age of 18 showed that 7 in 10 (69%) are very worried about school work and exams and 2 in 3 (66%) were worried about their future. As the top two worries of young people, according to Wysa, many young people will be feeling anxious and stressed now more than any other time in their lives so far. Anthony is in the middle of his Year 11 exams, so what can we and he, do to help?

Helping my autistic son to have more responsibility

There's been a lot of focus on schools and qualifications for teenagers over the last few years - and rightly so.  But being a teenager can mean learning a lot more than just academics.  For many kids this is the time they need to learn about  being responsible for themselves, learning the life skills they will need to become as independent as possible.  For some it will be learning about budgeting and time keeping for others this might be being able to make a meal or get dressed independently.  

Trying to tell if my pre-verbal autistic son is in pain?

David is not like most other twelve year old boys. He's not got a favourite football team, he doesn't eat pizza and he's never played a game of Fortnite. But that's not surprising.  David is autistic and part of this means he's also never tied his own shoes, independently brushed his own teeth or used spoken words to tell us anything other than his basic wants.  One of my greatest concerns is that David will need to tell me something and he can't.

And one of the things I worry about him not being able to tell me... is if he is in pain. 

The clothing of an autistic teenager

Anthony is rapidly heading towards his 15th birthday.  He is well and truly into his teenage years and it shows.  He is changing all the time - he's now way taller than me, struggles with his new array of emotions and constantly wants to assert his independence (when before everything was help me).  But even as a relatively well functioning autistic teen, change is challenging.  And to top it all off the wardrobe of a teen changes too. 

Ways to improve our well-being for 2023

In the last year a lot has changed.  It's become obvious that taking care of my family's mental health is a major priority, much more than ever.  It's something I've always been aware of but it has turned into a daily concern here. 

Protecting our autistic kids in winter weather

As it starts to get very cold, the snow starts to fall and the days become darker we still want to get out and about with our kids but need to be extra careful with them.  Our autistic kids can't always communicate with us about how their body is feeling and there senses can become overwhelmed by winter weather.  So what can we do to support them?

Gift ideas to help develop imaginary play

Many kids with autism struggle to develop their imagination and struggle with enjoying imaginative play.  It's something we've really worked on and our middle son is just getting there with some things in it.  There's lots of ways to access your imagination but many kids with autism find it difficult to create things from nothing and we've found that providing props and support is a way to support them.  Here's some ideas if you are looking for things this Christmas. 

Tips for parents as more children need speech and language support

I saw a recent article on the BBC that showed the number of five and six-year-olds who need speech and language support at school has risen by 10% in England over the past year. As a parent of two children with speech and language and communication difficulties, related to their autism diagnoses, I know of the huge stretch this must create on the system.

Five things that cause stress for my autistic kids

My kids can become frustrated for a variety of reasons and it isn’t always easy to pinpoint the underlying cause of their emotions.  Once a few of these things start piling up it can ending causing them a stress they can no longer cope with.  Two of them have communications difficulties, but even our daughter can struggle sometime to explain what she's feeling or why.   As a parent of autistic kids I've learned to behave like a detective and have found several things that cause my kids to escalate   

Preparing our autistic kids for a trip to the dentist

 We all know just how important it is that we take good care of our dental health at every age. Children need to have a good oral hygiene routine in place as soon as possible if they are to grow up with healthy teeth and gums. But it's not always easy, in fact for some of my kids it's anything but. 

Helping our autistic kids stay safe when using the internet

The internet is a great and exciting place filled with opportunities to explore new ideas, stay in touch with friends, and find new interests. My kids had been playing a variety of age appropriate games on gaming consoles for years before they really needed and wanted to use the internet.  As a parent, we want to ensure our kids use the internet safely and responsibly as it's a viral source of information for them. 

Tips for restarting a self-care routine

As a parent and someone who likely has a very busy schedule, I nearly always put my wellness on the backburner lately. If this is your situation then it may be time to re-evaluate and try a new approach.

Our essential travel items for our autistic kids

If you've managed to get your passport renewed then you may be heading away for a summer holiday soon - and we are looking forward to it. Obviously there are all the normal things that we think about a a family travelling with autistic kids. Where we are going, what type of accommodation works for us and so on.   But it's been so long since we went through an airport or stayed in a foreign country I've felt a bit nervous about it.  But there are things we take that make things a bit easier on holidays for us and our autistic kids. 

5 tips for parents of recently diagnosed autistic children

When we were told that our first child was diagnosed with autism, we were handed a small bifold leaflet for the National Autistic Society and another for a local organisation that supported parents of children with disabilities. We were referred to Speech and Language and Occupational Therapy but that took a while to start and I didn't know much about what to do to help our son.  Before the kids were born I had a newborn checklist but there wasn't anything to help with what to do following their autism diagnosis.  Here's what I thought could go on such a list.  

One day son, you will be an autistic adult

All to often, the adults in conversations about autism are parents.  They are the parents of autistic children. Over 70 years ago, these adults were blamed for their children's conditions.  Autism was due to bad parenting.  Recent studies have no called them 'super parents'.  As a parents of autistic children I needed help to understand them and I still need help to work with them and help them engage in the world around them.  But I'm very much aware that one day I will not be the only adult in the conversation in the future.  The other adults will be my children. Because autistic children become autistic adults.

The books that helped us as our autistic kids grew up; from pre-school to teenager

I was pretty sure that our eldest was autistic before he was diagnosed. But it was still an odd feeling to hear it confirmed.  The paediatrician seemed to be expecting tears or questions and it made me feel nervous - it made the diagnosis feel like an occasion.

Supporting an autism mum through pregnancy

Being a parent to my autistic and neurotypical kids is definitely the best and hardest thing I have ever done.  They are amazing little people - except for Anthony of course as he's now an amazing tall person since he became a teenager!  I was pregnant with our second son, David, when we were sat in the Paedatrician's office and autism was first mentioned by the professionals.  The Paediatrician said that it was possible that autism was genetic but they don't really know.